I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
