whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Non-Jews are for practice
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
