Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
