This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
