it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
