I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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