I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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