I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
This show inspires me to have sex in space
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Randomize
