Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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