I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
