You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
