batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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