I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize