We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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