so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
