New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I currently don't understand fingers.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
