I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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