Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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