Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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