i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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