Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
