I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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