she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Randomize
