recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize