I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
