READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
