I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Someone came in the potted fern
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
