I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
