What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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