sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize
