This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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