so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
