If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
