Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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