yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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