I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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