We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Randomize
