I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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