I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
