I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
