Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
