Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
You are a genius and a whore.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
