...so i touched it.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Randomize