Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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