Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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