Quick, to the slutcave!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
