It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Randomize
