Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
