Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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