Don't make out with my wife yet
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
